Steph Campbell

As I opened one eye this morning ambivalent about whether I was ready to wake up or not just yet, I became keenly aware that I was indeed still alive.  "I've made it another day!" I thought to myself.  Another day of life, on a beautiful September day.  I had a very busy schedule facing me this morning.  It's not really my favorite thing to be all that busy and today I was packed solid.  Met up with a friend.  School P.A. meeting.  Doctors appointment.  Nutritionist appointment.  Coaching call.  Another coaching call (with Tom!).  Went flat out until 9:00 pm.  I started out this crisp end of the summer but really feels like fall day with my usual practice and prayer.  I said "Yo... how bout' a little help down here!  I seem to be lacking faith today, not really feeeeeeling it if you know what I mean.  Could you please help me and throw me a sign or two???"  Then I flipped open my Course in Miracles book and of course the page I landed on was all about..

One of my very best gal pals called me this morning to tell me she read my blog and had some thoughts about it.  This amazing woman and I have known each other since the tender age of nine.  We met one Halloween evening when our father's (separately) took us out trick or treating and bumped into each other.   As our Dad's were saying hello we looked at each other and were dressed exactly alike!  We were dressed as grow up ladies.. tee hee.  And quite stunning ones I might add.  The next day at school she invited me to her house and we became inseparable.  And to this day 34 years later, we are still very good friends.  How lucky am I? Well, the "con" about having great friends who know you is they call and tell you the truth... like it or not.  She called and told me that I sounded angry.  She was reading my blog and I sound angry to her.  I was taken back a bit.  Don't get me wrong I am a fiery red head who knows that sometimes anger is indeed what I feel.  How

I'm tired tonight with not alot to say.  I find sometimes less is more.  So I will say this before I head off to sleep. I believe food is comparable to heroin or alcohol or television, or sex or shopping or anythink we use in life that we cannot put down when it's hurting us, is a filler.  This may be a bold statement, but do not underestimate the power of eating for pleasure.  Do not underestimate this deadly addiction that is happening in our world.  It is virtually impossible to heal, change a lifestyle and find freedom from addiction without questioning our beliefs about how we have been living.  In my experience there is a structure in place, the structure consists of many thoughts that support each other and ultimately drives us to use something to distract from our suffering.  God or somekind of Higher Source is missing at the same time.  I am seeing so clearly for myself that what is saving me is my willingness to question everything that I have ever believed that cau

I eat and eat and addiction kicks in until I allow something or someone in life to move me.  I stifle these feelings and harbor resentment and ponder the "what if's" of my youth until I surrender to being moved to tears.  I got back on track finally.  I told you I was done and I meant it.  I followed my heart and the cues of this body and took stellar care of myself today in the food department.  I drank my green smoothies, ate my veggies and protein and had my shakes with blueberries.  I took my vitamins, moved my body and gave and received love.  I spoke with my son and most importantly gave myself a day of rest and relaxation.  And then I decided to watch television.  What did Yours Truly land on?  "Man vs. Food".. hello?  And I stayed and I watched Adam embark on a HUMUNGOUS Sunday.  For anyone who has never watched this gluttonous T.V. show (which I happen to LOVE), it is about a man, I would say in his late twenties/early thirties, who travels the cou

"When you know that there is enough, you stop competing with others.  You stop competing for love, or money, or sex, or power, or whatever it is you felt there was not enough of.  The competition is over." - Communion With God by Neil Donald Walsh. I have not stopped competing as a rule.  Sometimes I stop, but then I stop stopping and compete.  Walsh goes onto say "This alters everything.  Now instead of competing with others to get what you want, you begin to give what you want away.  The reason for this is clear.  It has nothing to do with the fact that what you have done is "morally right," or "spiritualy enlightened," or the "Will of God".  It has to do with a simple truth: There is noone else in the room.  There is only one of us ." I love this!  Oh don't get me wrong, I am not so generous all the time.  I eat becaus I believe in lack.  I use food to fill this black velvet void that I believe lives somewhere inside of me (w

Forgot to tell you, no green smoothies today!  Damn.  I did get my vita mixer though ... green smoothies tomorrow!! 

Well... getting back on the wagon wasn't as easy as I thought it would be today.  I got up, had my shake with blueberries and the intentions I had paved the road to hell!!  My son was chosen to shoot a music video by two film students.  My son is eleven and I went to watch.  It was a true joy.  I loved watching him in the creation of this life experience.  But between you and me, I found myself a little jealous.   I sat and watched as life just fell into place for him .  Both his father and I were there.  And while I became very still and present with my thoughts that were having me suffer, I thought "my life has fallen into place too, it just doesn't look the way you think it "should" look Stepharino".   That's right, while I was having my internal selfish temper tantrum, I realized that Jonah was born at the very perfect time and his life is unfolding in the very perfect way.. and if this is true, then so is mine.  I suppose that even though music is m